Monday, June 9, 2008

i'm not the only one, right?

Frequently in life, I find myself experiencing events that I wonder if other people have experienced. Yesterday was no exception to this phenomenon. However, a little back story may be in order!

My father in law is a big time sailor. Loves it. Talks about, thinks about it, wants to do it all the time. Its good to have a hobby and sailing is the one he has chosen. While I am not as into it as he is, its still a good time -- and it has been fun to learn the basics from him.

He sails with a group of other guys (collectively, the fleet) every other weekend. They go from place to place to race their boats. Its fun to watch, and even more fun to participate in. The fleet is composed of guys from all walks of life and with varying degrees of experience. One of these guys forms the basis of my story.

This particular guy (referred to in our family as "B.O.", because he smells like BO), is quite easily the dirtiest person I have ever met who was not homeless. I am dead serious. He always has food all over himself, his boat/car is filthy. If I did not know better, I would assume this guy was homeless. He is not. He is a firefighter. That's kind of an impressive profession, right? Helping people . . . making the world a safer place. I am 99.99% sure that is NOT why B.O. got into firefighting. He got into it for the glory. How do I know this? Because everytime I have to talk to B.O. all he can talk about is how many people he has pulled from the clutches of death. I am not exaggerating this at all. It's hard to take a guy seriously when his shirt could be studied by a geologist to determine every meal the dude had in the last 2 weeks . . . and its even harder to believe such a guy actually provides a valuable social service.

Anyways . . . now you know B.O. He is the main character in my "experience". I am not sure if B.O. has memory loss, or just cares so little about people that he doesn't think it worthwhile to remember the names/faces of people he meets. I have (literally) been introduced to B.O. 10-12 times over the last 4 years. Always the same set of circumstances (regatta, some fleet event). Every single time, he acts as if we have never met. I mean every single time. Without fail.

So, we are currently hosting a regatta at our summer place. 10 boats and all their crew converged on the house last night for dinner. I was tasked with running the grill. No big deal. I love grilling -- so I was happy to help out. I have been at the grill for 30 minutes or so when B.O. walks up, introduces himself, and starts to lecture me on how to grill. Trying to be nice, I just stand there -- smiling, nodding and acting interested in what he is saying. I finish up the grilling and start eating. B.O. follows me -- now, well into stories about how he saves lives. The night progresses and B.O. talks the entire time. I wonder if they guys at his station house can stand him . . . or if he is the nerdy guy in the house who only feels like a "real" firefighter when he is out amongst the public.

At the end of the night, as B.O. is heading back towards his boat (presumably to sleep in a little pile of dirt), he turns to me and says -- "Well, thanks for your help grilling, Alex. I probably couldn't have fed all these people without your help." I am shocked . . . homeboy has no idea what my name is, and has convinced himself that he, not anyone else, prepared all the food.

The real kicker . . . this same thing happened 3 years ago at a different regatta (me on the grill, him lecturing while drinking my beer) except in that instance -- he called me Allan.

I guess I should give him points for at least getting the first letter of my name right. But, am I the only person who experiences like this in life? I sure hope not.

3 comments:

Patrick Peringer said...

I know something like this has happened to me but I just can't think what it is, or more importantly who it is.

There is this professor at BGSU who I've been trying to get to perform a few of my choral pieces (he's the choral professor) the last few years, and every time I see him I reintroduce myself even though every thing he says he knows me. But then in the halls he never says hi or acknowledges me, so I don't know.

He's been not performing my pieces for three years, and I really hope that this year he decides on performing at least one, since I am part-time faculty now.

By the way, I laughed my ass off reading this post.

Jen said...

You do realize that when you start a sentence with "We are currently hosting a regatta at our summer place," you lose a little bit of street cred?

Good story- I HATE people like that!! I make it my duty to point out exactly how many times and where I have met the person previously when the are ignorant (feigned or not) regarding our previous meetings....

Lily said...

An attorney at work calls me "Lila", and I don't correct him. I think it's funnier this way. Then again, he showers, so I guess my story isn't so bad.